Chavez for the UN

Sugary humor

2006-10-28T18:17:00.000-07:00

With Chávez, the world will commemorate a Military coup!

2006-02-04T15:04:00.000-08:00

With Chavez, the world will have a new holiday: February 4, in honor of February 4, 1992, the day Liutenent Colonel Chavez failed in his Military Coup against the democratically elected President Carlos Andrés Pérez.

In Venezuela Chavez commemorates the day with a huge march paid by the goverment and fed by civil servants that are bused from all over the country to celebrate!! Isn't that great? Wouldn't you like that your UN goverment paid as well a local march with all those buses to commemorate Chavez Military Coup? Here are goverment announcements made in a major newspaper to remind the people that the celebration had to take place:

And here are the happy participants that had to spend a whole Saturday celebrating in joy! Probably civil servants that decided that the best way to spend their Saturday was celebrating for a failed Military Coup.

And this are the comfortable buses to take you from anywhere to make sure that there is a HUGE march.

Why should the rest of the world refrain from having a Universal day of commemoration of February 4, 1992?

See here? Even people from Australia came to Caracas to celebrate Chavez's Military Coup anniversary! They are actually quite happy, if you look carefully they look like the happiest group in the crowd!

Another important advantage of these type of gathering is that the goverment pays for all those new red T-shirts, creating jobs in manufacturing and in the preparation of red dye.

So why wait?

Chávez for the UN!

Experience with war-like infrastructure situations

2006-01-15T07:00:00.000-08:00

No, these pictures are not the results of a war. Fortunately, there is no war in Venezuela, we do not need it,Chavez takes care of it. But this is not false advertisement, Chavez has indeed confirmed experience in treating the collapse of all types of vital infrastructures. From the Caracas-Valencia highway collapse due to bad maintenance, to the bridges of Tachira state..He has had a lot of practice, he has been practicing for seven years! No other president in the history of Venezuela had such an expertise. And he now faces a huge challenge: a 7 million city cut from its Airport, port and major touristic area for him to practice even more. What? Why he did not foresee the collapse of the viaduct? Do you want to know what he was doing during those seven years? Preparing of course! All this has been in preparation for what was coming and we now got the tangible results. For instance, after ONLY Ten Days he has already put together a contingency team to figure out what they have to do. See? Experience and preparation really counts. You will never find such an experienced politician in a war-like situation without ever being in a war situation! You'll have the best of both worlds: no war, but just like being in a war. So support Chavez for the UN!

No more public votes in the UN. Welcome to Chavez 's Latest Voting technology!

2005-12-07T10:28:00.000-08:00

One of the good reasons to get Chavez in the UN is that you can make sure that your vote will definetely be State of the Art! Fingerprinting connected to voting machines. Databases specifying your voting preferences and your personal data , totally automated voting centers! The days of raising your hands in the Security Council are gone forever, from now on, vote will be secret and ELECTRONIC! Of course, all safely monitored by our own CNE (Venezuelan Election Council)

With Chavez Everybody lives longer!

2005-12-02T10:23:00.000-08:00

Since Chavez took power, there has been some pretty old people registered in the Venezuelan Electoral Registry. So vote for Chavez if you want to live forever.

Mariachis! Another good reason to have Chavez in the UN

2005-11-20T20:44:00.000-08:00

This is another excellent reason to vote for Chavez in the UN. We promise that with Chavez, the days of boring UN meeting will be forever gone. The world could profit from the bigger showbiz Secretary of State ever. He sings pretty well too!

International Experience!

2005-11-07T21:03:00.000-08:00

Few world leaders have traveled so much and met so many world leaders as Hugo Chavez. Experience counts when electing a new Secretary General.

It all started with a letter...

2005-10-29T20:57:00.000-07:00

Dear Mr. Chavez:

I have been opposing you for some years now. I confess that I have been a critical ghost blogger writing essays against you and your government. Until yesterday I truly believed that that was my mission, but that is no longer the case.

You may wonder what happened. Well, a few days ago, the BBC prepared a program to invite you to answer some questions that the public sent for you (see here ). I was one of those Internet geeks that sent tough questions that were never chosen and I was quite mad reading the praises from people around the world that think that know you better. Then I saw your BBC interview and it totally changed my perception of who Hugo Chavez really is. I have been wrong and the thousands of non-Venezuelans that wrote to the BBC praising you and your acts have been right.

You were wonderful, Mr. Chavez. The President of Venezuela in international prime time! You were the essence of the discreet, elegant man, all smiles, well prepared, knowing what you were going to say and what to answer. Telling the people of the world exactly what they wanted to hear, the way they wanted to hear it. A real diplomat. A gentleman. Nothing to do with the vulgar character that appears on Sundays on Alo President to trash his foes in front of the camera, abusing his power. But I now know, my dear president, that that character is only for local Venezuelan consumption. The real Chavez is the one I saw on the BBC.

Your answers were absolutely charming. You stand for justice and democracy. You do not pass any laws restricting the press or those that criticize you. You do not persecute those that dissent with you and, in particular, there is no blacklisting in Venezuela. Those are stories invented by your enemies.

Now I am in total agreement with your views, Mr. Chavez. That BBC interview made me see the light. You are a victim. You have been the one persecuted by that oligarchy opposition of yours. They are really working hard, helped of course by the CIA, to perpetuate a false image of Hugo Chavez.

Even on the Internet, those despicable and persistent bloggers dedicate their lives to portray you in a bad light. I confess that I was one of them, Mr. Chavez, I acknowledge my past faults. But I have seen the truth. I repent. From now on, I will cherish every word you say and, as a token of my appreciation and my admiration I am volunteering to run your 2006 campaign, Mr. Chavez.

Yes, you read it right, your 2006 Campaign…

No, not the 2006 campaign for the Presidency of Venezuela!

You wouldn’t want that, would you?

Why Venezuela? Mr. Chavez, Venezuela is already too small for you!

You are bound to bigger, larger horizons. You are destined to be the Liberator of Latin America, just like Bolivar, or even better, the unifier of the Americas, or even better, the world, or even better, the Liberator of Human kind. The great leader of the 21^st century!

So, Mr. Chavez. Since there is no such a job yet. You have to start with something that will give you more international visibility….

No, not the President of Venezuela again… Forget that job….that is a good job while oil prices are high, but if they go down the people of the world will not pay as much attention to you and you will get in trouble again in Venezuela. No, Mr. Chavez, you need a more permanent visible and secure position that will allow you to jump into higher and more important endeavors….

I have been thinking of running your campaign to be the Secretary General of the United Nations.

You see, Mr. Chavez, Kofi Annan will finish his term on December 31^st 2006. The timing is perfect for you (see here ).

I know, I know, the people of Venezuela will ask you to run again, to stay in power…but, Mr. Chavez, you have already made so many sacrifices for them. They will understand, they will gladly let you pass your turn as president so that the rest of the world enjoys your charms, your diligence and your intelligence.

Venezuelans are generous people and they will be so proud when they see you as the leader of the world.

Besides, once you are Secretary-General you will have more opportunities to directly fight against the US while spreading peace around you. I am sure that that panel in Norway will finally see the light themselves and will end up begging you to please accept the Nobel Peace Prize.

So please, Mr. President, allow me to be involved in this important step in the development of human kind.

I have already opened a site to initiate the campaign. And, if you agree, I promise that I will try to convince my fellow opposition bloggers to see the light as well and put all their energy into this new important challenge. So we will all be one, current dissident and chavista bloggers, Venezuelans and non-Venezuelans, finally reunited to work as one for the enterprise of our lives:

Hugo Chavez for the UN!

Yours truly,
Jorge Arena
Repentant Ghost Blogger.

Why this blog

2005-10-28T13:40:00.000-07:00

The object of this blog is to have a space to initiate the campaign to propose President Hugo Chavez of Venezuela for the job of Secretary general of the United Nations.

If you have any ideas on how help achieve such an important goal, or if you want to be part of the group that is promoting Chavez candidacy, please write in the Comments section or send me an e-mail.